Last week I exercised Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. I am really proud of myself for doing that and for making it to work at 8am each day. I have a new schedule so I will have to find a new way to fit working out in my schedule. Being able to stick to this schedule this past week has shown me how I can get out of depression by changing my sleep/wake cycle. I learned what the type of therapy that focuses on it interpersonal and social
rhythm therapy for bipolar disorder. The vital rational for
interpersonal and social rhythm therapy (IPSRT) is, "unstable or disrupted daily
routines lead to circadian instability and affective episodes in vulnerable
individuals." To keep moods stable clients keep a log of daily and nightly
activities, levels, of social stimulation, sleep and mood. The focus of therapy
goals are to "(a) identify a key interpersonal problem area; (b) set
targets for regulation meals, exercise, and sleep; (c) make plans for keeping
rhythm stable when disruptive social events occur; and (d) develop strategies
to manage the priority interpersonal problem area.." For more information see their website: https://www.ipsrt.org
This blog is kind of my IPSRT. I talk and that is what I am going to focus for this post. I am going to plan my schedule. Then I can get back at the end of the week and see how it went.
Sunday: wake 8:30 am ,exercise at or after 6:30pm sleep 12am
Monday: wake 8:30am (because I need to wake up the same time everyday), exercise at or before Noon, sleep 12am
Tuesday: wake up 8:30am, exercise at or before 9am - 10am latest sleep 12am
Wednesday: (same as Monday) wake 8:30am (because I need to wake up the same time everyday), exercise at or before Noon, sleep (due to early wake up) try for 9/10pm
Thursday: Wake up 4:30am 5am latest (leave house at 5:30), exercise at 2:30p or later, Sleep by 12am
Friday: (same as Monday) wake 8:30am, exercise at or before Noon, sleep 12am latest
Saturday: Sabbath relax and rest try to wake up by 9am for consistency
Sunday: not working so schedule is open wake up by 9am
That is my plan!
Finding excitement in the mundane is about getting excited about doing things I don't want to do. I have several goals that I have decided to pursue. Much of them I don't naturally want to do but will make my life better, like exercising. It is about making the most out of life and being determined and committed about accomplishing goals. Please read my first post for greater detail.
Sunday, December 7, 2014
Wednesday, December 3, 2014
Nightly Schedule
Thanksgiving week was not good for my health. I was at my parents house and they had some candy from Halloween. I could not stop from eating it all up.
Good news though, I got a job. I began training this week. I have to be there at 8 am so my schedule has been really tight. I had some coffee and I think it gave me motivation to go to the library and to the gym after class Monday. I came home and still managed to get to bed at a reasonable hour.
I think I can manage this new schedule, working out at night. Today is Tuesday. I made it to the library and to the gym again tonight. I did falter though; I ate two doughnuts. They weren't even that good. I regret it, because it wasn't worth it. I just have to get those thoughts out of my head. I start thinking about it and then I want it.
On Sunday I made a big batch of pasta and lentils so I would have dinner and lunch throughout the week. I passed up the lentils for a sandwich I bought at the grocery store. It was a Kings Hawaiian bun. Now that I am trying to avoid sugar it is to amazing how many things that are not sweets have sugar it. Even pasta sauce is sweet!
I feel good going into the finals week. I just need to keep this energy up and get work done.
Good news though, I got a job. I began training this week. I have to be there at 8 am so my schedule has been really tight. I had some coffee and I think it gave me motivation to go to the library and to the gym after class Monday. I came home and still managed to get to bed at a reasonable hour.
I think I can manage this new schedule, working out at night. Today is Tuesday. I made it to the library and to the gym again tonight. I did falter though; I ate two doughnuts. They weren't even that good. I regret it, because it wasn't worth it. I just have to get those thoughts out of my head. I start thinking about it and then I want it.
On Sunday I made a big batch of pasta and lentils so I would have dinner and lunch throughout the week. I passed up the lentils for a sandwich I bought at the grocery store. It was a Kings Hawaiian bun. Now that I am trying to avoid sugar it is to amazing how many things that are not sweets have sugar it. Even pasta sauce is sweet!
I feel good going into the finals week. I just need to keep this energy up and get work done.
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
Returning to Find the Excitement in the Mundane
I have gained weight. I have been depressed, sleeping and eating a lot. It may be because of a new medication change, but still its bad. When I am in my lows I compulsively eat. That is what I am battling now, staying in my bed all day and eating compulsively. I have realized it is an addiction. I am addicted to sugar and carbs. So what am I to do?
I am trying to create a schedule to keep me healthy, but schedules are hard for me to follow, as this blog is a testament of.
I started this new schedule goal last Friday. I was going to wake up and go to the gym before 8 am and abstain from eating sugar. I managed to do it one day. I woke up and went to the gym that first morning (Friday). I was doing good at avoiding sugar. I succeeded in 4 days without sugar, but then I cracked. I saw a picture of a twinkie and I wanted one. I don't even particularly like twenties. They are just okay in my opinion. I spent my last bit of money on twinkies & cookies at 11 pm Tuesday and a candy bar at 4 pm today (Wednesday) and chocolate fruit bites at 6pm. That is even more evidence of the addiction. That is a long way from where I was at the beginning of the semester. The idea of being addicted to food was very uncomfortable for me to face.
Thoughout the week I also realized that since I avoided sweets, I still compulsively ate carbs. What is really bad is that I will go to a lot of effort to have my addictive food. If I don't have any sweets on hand I will make some, the microwave cakes got me for awhile but recently I have gone to the lengths of making more strenuous foods such as shortbread cookies, yellow cake, and when I was avoiding sugar I made homemade focaccia. This was when all I had was a few ingredients in the house. I typically don't even like bread, I really just needed something to much on and the carrots weren't satisfying.
Soon I will learn how to avoid sweets and carbs and instead take satisfaction from having an apple or salad instead. Now I just have to focus on getting rid of the addiction.
I am realizing that I need to play to my strengths and weaknesses. I need to learn from my past and decide the best course of action. In the past I have used fitness pal to keep track of the every detailed account of what I ate. As you can tell from my blog posts I really don't like keeping track of what I eat. I tried sticking to a schedule of working out in the morning. These things helped, but they didn't work completely. I also need to learn to be flexible. If I fail to wake up one morning for early workouts then I can go in the afternoon or evening. It might help to keep a track of what I eat, but maybe be less detailed about it. Maybe only keeping track of when I ate rather than what I ate is more fitting.
I have to realize that I am not a morning person. It will always be difficult for me to wake up in the early morning. Therefore, I should not expect myself to wake up early to exercise. Today was a failure of the morning. I did not exercise, and missed a Dr. appointment. I stayed in bed to the very last minute that I needed for my interview. The day wasn't over. I still had time to exercise, so I went after class. Maybe exercise after class can become an option. I still would like to try to wake up early each morning to exercise, because it is healthy to have a schedule that prevents me from being in my bed all day.
I have also focused on a night time ritual. I get a cup of chamomile and ginger honey tea (yes it has sugar but it balances the strong ginger) at around 10pm. I also take my medication at 10 pm. This give me about an hour to do things like, write my blog, read the bible, read non-fiction or fiction. And another hour to focus on getting to bed, so I fall asleep at 12 (not go to bed at 12). It usually takes a little time to transition from being in bed to falling asleep.
I want to come back to writing in my blog more. My first semester of grad school is coming to an end. I haven't been writing in here because I have been occupied with my grad school work, and plus I didn't feel like it. I really just didn't want to face my goals.
I have bipolar disorder and my moods wax and wane from goal directed motivation to lazy lack of interest. It is a struggle to find a balance and that is my goal for this blog. I am Determined-2b-Determined to "Find the Excitement in the Mundane "goals that will keep me healthy. Thursday, July 24, 2014
not into it
I have been eating pretty good since my last post but I just don't feel like writing everyday.
My eating is definitely tied to my mood.
My eating is definitely tied to my mood.
Monday, July 21, 2014
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
On the go good choices
Whoohoo Excitement: I made healthy choices today!
I was driving literally the whole day today. I started the day off with a nutrition shake. After driving down town and back and to west Marietta and back, I was hungry. It was barely 11, but I was out of the house at 7:45. I had to get some things done at home before I could leave for statesboro, but the day seemed to be dragging and I just wanted to get on the road. It was a 3 1/2 hour drive. I wanted to just grab something. I decided that I could get something healthy at Arby's, and I was right. I got a turkey swiss on whole wheat bread. It had a lot of flavor which I was really happy about, because I have some weakness when it comes to making sandwiches for myself; they never have flavor. There is also an option to get the sandwich I got in a whole wheat wrap if you want less bread. I got a medium peach tea, which probably had too much sugar.
I drove a long time and needed some caffeine, so I got a small mocha cappuccino. It was good, but really suggary. Even for me! I couldn't even finish it.
I forgot to mention how big the sandwich was from Arby's. I could have eaten the whole thing, but I had no need to stuff myself and it would be more useful for later in the day. I did end up eating it later, it was great to have on hand because I was rushing around and got hungry.
Before I hit the road to come back home I thought I need something to eat, it was after 8pm. I decided on a healthy fast food choice. I discovered this recently. Its great! Order a Kids meal with 6 piece grilled nuggets with fruit not fries, water and chocolate milk. AND it's under $5! The grilled chicken tastes marinated and grilled like a kabob, no sauce needed. I use the water as my drink and the chocolate milk as a dessert. The fruit is kinda like a dessert too.
I have to admit they accidentally gave me fries instead of fruit. I ate a few of them before driving all the way back around and getting my fruit. I did not finish the fries, they ended up being throw away so I have that much to be proud of.
On the way home the drive was like a black hole. The streets were so dead. It made me tired. I had to get some caffeine. I got a redbull and did not drink the whole thing.
Mundane: Driving forever
No exercise
I was driving literally the whole day today. I started the day off with a nutrition shake. After driving down town and back and to west Marietta and back, I was hungry. It was barely 11, but I was out of the house at 7:45. I had to get some things done at home before I could leave for statesboro, but the day seemed to be dragging and I just wanted to get on the road. It was a 3 1/2 hour drive. I wanted to just grab something. I decided that I could get something healthy at Arby's, and I was right. I got a turkey swiss on whole wheat bread. It had a lot of flavor which I was really happy about, because I have some weakness when it comes to making sandwiches for myself; they never have flavor. There is also an option to get the sandwich I got in a whole wheat wrap if you want less bread. I got a medium peach tea, which probably had too much sugar.
I drove a long time and needed some caffeine, so I got a small mocha cappuccino. It was good, but really suggary. Even for me! I couldn't even finish it.
I forgot to mention how big the sandwich was from Arby's. I could have eaten the whole thing, but I had no need to stuff myself and it would be more useful for later in the day. I did end up eating it later, it was great to have on hand because I was rushing around and got hungry.
Before I hit the road to come back home I thought I need something to eat, it was after 8pm. I decided on a healthy fast food choice. I discovered this recently. Its great! Order a Kids meal with 6 piece grilled nuggets with fruit not fries, water and chocolate milk. AND it's under $5! The grilled chicken tastes marinated and grilled like a kabob, no sauce needed. I use the water as my drink and the chocolate milk as a dessert. The fruit is kinda like a dessert too.
I have to admit they accidentally gave me fries instead of fruit. I ate a few of them before driving all the way back around and getting my fruit. I did not finish the fries, they ended up being throw away so I have that much to be proud of.
On the way home the drive was like a black hole. The streets were so dead. It made me tired. I had to get some caffeine. I got a redbull and did not drink the whole thing.
Mundane: Driving forever
No exercise
Tuesday, July 15, 2014
Not prepared
Monday, back to work. I spend the day a home I nanny at. Lately there hasn't been much good to eat there, except sweets and junk food. I had a little bit more time this morning so I was able to grab a chick-fla chicken biscuit. As I was eating it I was realizing how greasy it was. I really need to be more restrictive. Of course sometimes its convenience. I need to get back to what I was doing before. Always having something on hand to prevent me from eating something unhealthy. For a quick breakfast I had nutrition shakes to take on the road. They have a lot of sugar, but I figure they are still better for me. I know they have more nutrition - vitamins and minerals. I was thirsty. I used to be content with water, but lately I want something flavored. I really should have bought the orange juice at chick-fla, because now I wanted the unhealthy Fanta. I side stepped the Fanta and went for the more healthy option of chocolate milk, but it didn't satisfy. It wasn't wet enough. So later I ended up drinking the Fanta too. For lunch I made pasta, but it was terrible. I would have eaten it, but I figured why waste the calories. Since I was so unsatisfied with lunch I ate a chocolate chip cookie. I also had eaten some watermelon as a snack. The watermelon was nice and juicy. I love fruit and if I always had it on hand it really would keep me out of trouble. When I got home I had half of a protein shake to tide me over until dinner. I went to a meet up at the wing café. I drank water and had 10 wings and celery sticks. Wings aren't the most healthy because they are fried (not breaded), but at least it is solid protein. I forgot to add I had a bite of dark chocolate when I was waiting for dinner. That is an example of mindless eating. Something I need to quit, and replace with smart snacks. I need to be better prepared.
I am learning a lot by reflecting on what I eat, but I really need to make changes. Should I go back to counting calories? I found it to be so finicky. Such a trouble trying to get the exact food. I would rather just make better choices and eat smaller portions.
The meet up was really enjoyable. I had several in depth conversations about my faith and that of others. I think the shema I am wearing on my wrist started all the conversation. It is a beautiful thing. I have plans to meet up with two of the guys I met there tonight. One was pursing me for a relationship. He expressed wanting to see me again and qualities about myself he likes. We discussed things that are important to us in dating. We were in agreement. He expressed an interest in my faith which is very important to me. The other guy is Jewish and from Iran he says he doesn't practice it much. I asked him what he thought about Yahushua (Jesus) he said He didn't believe in him and something about kabbalah and mystics. I don't know, but he was interested in continuing our conversation about it and we are meeting.
Mundane: poor choices in food
Excitement: Meeting a guy who is interested in having a relationship with me and interested in my faith
no exercise
I am learning a lot by reflecting on what I eat, but I really need to make changes. Should I go back to counting calories? I found it to be so finicky. Such a trouble trying to get the exact food. I would rather just make better choices and eat smaller portions.
The meet up was really enjoyable. I had several in depth conversations about my faith and that of others. I think the shema I am wearing on my wrist started all the conversation. It is a beautiful thing. I have plans to meet up with two of the guys I met there tonight. One was pursing me for a relationship. He expressed wanting to see me again and qualities about myself he likes. We discussed things that are important to us in dating. We were in agreement. He expressed an interest in my faith which is very important to me. The other guy is Jewish and from Iran he says he doesn't practice it much. I asked him what he thought about Yahushua (Jesus) he said He didn't believe in him and something about kabbalah and mystics. I don't know, but he was interested in continuing our conversation about it and we are meeting.
Mundane: poor choices in food
Excitement: Meeting a guy who is interested in having a relationship with me and interested in my faith
no exercise
Sunday, July 13, 2014
Wedding and Travel
Saturday was the day of the wedding. Sunday (today) was the day I traveled back. These are the kind of days that I am prone to skipping putting on here, because I am so busy and probably didn't do the best time watching what I ate.
On Saturday I went to breakfast at the hotel. I had an omelet with cheese tomato peppers and onions, cranberry juice, and pineapple juice. I went back to bed, by time I woke up it was lunch time. I drove downtown Dallas, because I was determined to see the city even just for a little. I went to this nice hotel restaurant and had fried redfish sandwich with lettuce tomato and tartar sauce on a bun with a side of salad with vinaigrette. I am proud of getting the salad instead of the fries. Next was the wedding. I had two pieces of bite sized toast with tomatoes and cheese on it and a chicken finger. I also had 8 oz. sprite. I had some wedding cake, but only a small piece.
Sunday I woke up and was going to a brunch so while I was waiting for that I munched on too many cookie. I probably should have never bought those cookies, but they were homemade and looked so innocent. At brunch I had a small breakfast burrito with cheese potatoes and eggs, pineapple, raspberries, strawberries, tomatoes in vinaigrette, orange juice, cappuccino with cocoa, a slice of special bread. For dinner I had Cajun fries from five guys, pita with beef, hummus, cucumber tomato, yoghurt sauce, then I had a shortbread with dark chocolate.
No exercise.
Mundane eating too many cookies
Excitement choosing lettuce and not very much cake nor appetizers
On Saturday I went to breakfast at the hotel. I had an omelet with cheese tomato peppers and onions, cranberry juice, and pineapple juice. I went back to bed, by time I woke up it was lunch time. I drove downtown Dallas, because I was determined to see the city even just for a little. I went to this nice hotel restaurant and had fried redfish sandwich with lettuce tomato and tartar sauce on a bun with a side of salad with vinaigrette. I am proud of getting the salad instead of the fries. Next was the wedding. I had two pieces of bite sized toast with tomatoes and cheese on it and a chicken finger. I also had 8 oz. sprite. I had some wedding cake, but only a small piece.
Sunday I woke up and was going to a brunch so while I was waiting for that I munched on too many cookie. I probably should have never bought those cookies, but they were homemade and looked so innocent. At brunch I had a small breakfast burrito with cheese potatoes and eggs, pineapple, raspberries, strawberries, tomatoes in vinaigrette, orange juice, cappuccino with cocoa, a slice of special bread. For dinner I had Cajun fries from five guys, pita with beef, hummus, cucumber tomato, yoghurt sauce, then I had a shortbread with dark chocolate.
No exercise.
Mundane eating too many cookies
Excitement choosing lettuce and not very much cake nor appetizers
Friday, July 11, 2014
7-10-14
We set out for Dallas, TX today. I started the day out with a bowl of granola like cereal with dried fruit. Before we left town we stopped at Chick-fla. My mom, dad and me all shared 4 fried chicken strips, 8 grilled nuggets, and waffle fries. I probably ended up having 1.5 strips, and 4 grilled nuggets, 5 fries. I was drinking 8oz of root beer. We finished the meal with strawberries. I probably had 4. I had some Chex mix and mixed nuts on our drive as snacks. For dinner we ate at a buffet in a casino. I think I did very well for eating at a buffet. I filled my plate completely with vegetables, then got one slice of turkey which I only ate half of. The vegetables included: creamy cauliflower (it was really good and could be an alternative to pasta alfredo), broccoli with onions, cream corn, stuffing, okra in stewed tomatoes (I didn't eat much of it because I didn't like it). I think that is all. I did have dessert. A few bites of strawberry cheese cake, a few bites of chocolate cake, one scoop of vanilla ice cream.
I did not exercise today.
Finding excitement: We went to several gas stations and vending machines and I resisted from buying junk food or candy.
Being on a vacation might be difficult to watch what I eat. I think the main thing is to enjoy the food, not worry about what it is, but just making sure I keep my proportions small.
I did not exercise today.
Finding excitement: We went to several gas stations and vending machines and I resisted from buying junk food or candy.
Being on a vacation might be difficult to watch what I eat. I think the main thing is to enjoy the food, not worry about what it is, but just making sure I keep my proportions small.
Wednesday, July 9, 2014
No Cookies!
Today I did well.
Yesterday when I went to the psychiatrist and expressed my concern for my weight in regards to my medication, because most bipolar medications can cause weight gain, She was insistent to impress on me that my eating habits were the cause of the weight gain. She asked me some questions about what I eat, what my weakness were. I said it was sweets. She asked me what kind and I said whatever is near by. She told me to that I couldn't exclude all sweets and that I needed to pick out one thing. I said cookies. The house I nanny at always has cookies around. I take one here and there and don't think too much of it. It was uncomfortable talking with my doctor like that, but it was helpful and I am thankful that she pushed me to recognize that I need to take responsibility and make better choices about what I eat. Excitement Today I did not have any cookies! or any dessert for that matter.
On that note here is what I did eat:
nutrition shake, 1 slice wheat bread 1 egg 1 slice American cheese. minestrone soup with ritz crackers, clear nutrition drink. small portion of noodles chicken and egg, small bit of special k cereal and 2%milk, a couple of sips of root beer.
Mundane I did not exercise Determination its not quite there yet for exercise but I do get excited to exercise when I am doing it with other people like hiking or softball.
Yesterday when I went to the psychiatrist and expressed my concern for my weight in regards to my medication, because most bipolar medications can cause weight gain, She was insistent to impress on me that my eating habits were the cause of the weight gain. She asked me some questions about what I eat, what my weakness were. I said it was sweets. She asked me what kind and I said whatever is near by. She told me to that I couldn't exclude all sweets and that I needed to pick out one thing. I said cookies. The house I nanny at always has cookies around. I take one here and there and don't think too much of it. It was uncomfortable talking with my doctor like that, but it was helpful and I am thankful that she pushed me to recognize that I need to take responsibility and make better choices about what I eat. Excitement Today I did not have any cookies! or any dessert for that matter.
On that note here is what I did eat:
nutrition shake, 1 slice wheat bread 1 egg 1 slice American cheese. minestrone soup with ritz crackers, clear nutrition drink. small portion of noodles chicken and egg, small bit of special k cereal and 2%milk, a couple of sips of root beer.
Mundane I did not exercise Determination its not quite there yet for exercise but I do get excited to exercise when I am doing it with other people like hiking or softball.
I slipped away - being honest and determined
When I start slipping away from my goals I slip away from writing about it. I think writing here when I go through those times would help me to get back on track. I think I shy away from it, because I am ashamed. But here I am again time after time of slipping away, I am back to begin again.
I like to keep some things to myself. I like to present things a little softer. One big thing I have been avoiding is my weight. Much of the motivation to start this blog is to motivate me to exercise and eat right. I have not being up front about the fact that I want to loose weight. I have said instead said "get healthy". Admitting that I need/want to loose weight is stigmatized in my mind. I don't want to be in the category of every other woman out there who thinks she is fat. I hate that. I have always taken pride in being satisfied with myself. Truth is I am not, but instead of facing that fact I have just avoided it. I want to be more open about my quest to loose weight. With that I want to share with you, something I have not been vocal about, my weight.
To use this blog to be most effective in my journey to Find the Excitement in the Mundane I need to be more consistent about posting. I am going to try this general format: begin with what is mundane provide explanation then end with how I am being determined about finding excitement in it. Additionally I will post what I ate that day and if I did any exercise and my weight and waist (once a week). I want to say that some posts may end up being only a few sentences, but I don't want brevity to prevent me from posting. Even posting a small reflection will help me to stay on track and meet my goals.
Today
Mundane: Accepting I am fat and it is because of the poor choices I take in my diet
Grub: Frootloops, some cookies, panda express bowl veggies and mushroom chicken, sweet raspberry tea, homemade couis couis ground beef cheese pablano peppers, boiled cob corn and broccoli, fresh strawberries in Hershey's chocolate spread
Exercise: Not today
Lbs.: 171 (doctors scale)
Find Excitement: I made this post after months without, which is a sign of progress. The beginning of tracking progress.
I like to keep some things to myself. I like to present things a little softer. One big thing I have been avoiding is my weight. Much of the motivation to start this blog is to motivate me to exercise and eat right. I have not being up front about the fact that I want to loose weight. I have said instead said "get healthy". Admitting that I need/want to loose weight is stigmatized in my mind. I don't want to be in the category of every other woman out there who thinks she is fat. I hate that. I have always taken pride in being satisfied with myself. Truth is I am not, but instead of facing that fact I have just avoided it. I want to be more open about my quest to loose weight. With that I want to share with you, something I have not been vocal about, my weight.
To use this blog to be most effective in my journey to Find the Excitement in the Mundane I need to be more consistent about posting. I am going to try this general format: begin with what is mundane provide explanation then end with how I am being determined about finding excitement in it. Additionally I will post what I ate that day and if I did any exercise and my weight and waist (once a week). I want to say that some posts may end up being only a few sentences, but I don't want brevity to prevent me from posting. Even posting a small reflection will help me to stay on track and meet my goals.
Today
Mundane: Accepting I am fat and it is because of the poor choices I take in my diet
Grub: Frootloops, some cookies, panda express bowl veggies and mushroom chicken, sweet raspberry tea, homemade couis couis ground beef cheese pablano peppers, boiled cob corn and broccoli, fresh strawberries in Hershey's chocolate spread
Exercise: Not today
Lbs.: 171 (doctors scale)
Find Excitement: I made this post after months without, which is a sign of progress. The beginning of tracking progress.
"Motivation is hard to come by. It is my motto of the season to find excitement in the mundane. This is the only way I believe I can conjure up some motivation to do all the things I need to do for a better life but don't want to do. It is about convincing myself that I want this. I am not determined, but I want to be. I want to be determined, I want to be consistent. I need to be. All of my goals are nothing without consistency." -Me from previous post
Sunday, March 30, 2014
Flipped
This past week was better than the last but as the week was ending things got flipped.
I did manage to meet my quota for volunteering. I made it to the morning volunteer work once this week on Wednesday. By the grace of Yahweh it was easier for me to find willing participants. I was supposed to go Thursday morning, but opted not to for the excuse that I was sick the night before. Yep I got sick this week. Wednesday afternoon during my usual nanny job I started having a head ache which got progressively worse as the day continued and finally as the night came I was vomiting. Vomiting is terrible! It may have been from leftover fish I ate, but I have never heard of food sickness starting as a headache. Thankfully I was not scheduled to waitress Wednesday night.
Thursday night I did not sleep. I made use of the time and did some recumbent bike slower higher resistance for 30 minutes. I managed to get one hour before I had to get ready to leave to go to the volunteer meeting. I was still about 7 minutes late. I have the tendency to stay in bed until the "OH SHIT I better go now or else" moment. My mood while doing volunteer work on Thursday was better than it was on Wednesday. I was cheerful and confident. The lack of sleep seemed to put me in a better mood. I think that too much sleep can put me in a down mood.
I noticed my appetite was less Friday night. I hardly ate any dinner. I wonder if it is because I did not sleep the night before.
Friday night I went to sleep at my usual time of 12am. I had my alarm set for two separate times, not too early. I was trying to get myself in the habit of waking up earlier because I have to be at work at 7:45am all next week. I somehow slept through all my alarms - I don't even recall hearing them. I finally got out of bed at 1 something and didn't make it to Sabbath service until 2pm - 2 hours late. AND I was still sleepy during the service. So much so I went to my car to take a nap. Even after taking the nap, when I came inside I was still sleepy! What in the world!
Now it is Sunday Morning 7:30am and I was unable to sleep. And I have to work 11 hours waitressing today. :-) I think I will be okay though.
On the plus side while I was not sleeping I was very productive and had some creative ideas as well as very well needed prayers. I have been lacking in prayer and spiritual activity. But praise Yahweh I finsally had ap 2 way conversation in prayer and also a revelation from Luke ch 1. More on that in my other blog: Walking with Yahushua
I did manage to meet my quota for volunteering. I made it to the morning volunteer work once this week on Wednesday. By the grace of Yahweh it was easier for me to find willing participants. I was supposed to go Thursday morning, but opted not to for the excuse that I was sick the night before. Yep I got sick this week. Wednesday afternoon during my usual nanny job I started having a head ache which got progressively worse as the day continued and finally as the night came I was vomiting. Vomiting is terrible! It may have been from leftover fish I ate, but I have never heard of food sickness starting as a headache. Thankfully I was not scheduled to waitress Wednesday night.
Thursday night I did not sleep. I made use of the time and did some recumbent bike slower higher resistance for 30 minutes. I managed to get one hour before I had to get ready to leave to go to the volunteer meeting. I was still about 7 minutes late. I have the tendency to stay in bed until the "OH SHIT I better go now or else" moment. My mood while doing volunteer work on Thursday was better than it was on Wednesday. I was cheerful and confident. The lack of sleep seemed to put me in a better mood. I think that too much sleep can put me in a down mood.
I noticed my appetite was less Friday night. I hardly ate any dinner. I wonder if it is because I did not sleep the night before.
Friday night I went to sleep at my usual time of 12am. I had my alarm set for two separate times, not too early. I was trying to get myself in the habit of waking up earlier because I have to be at work at 7:45am all next week. I somehow slept through all my alarms - I don't even recall hearing them. I finally got out of bed at 1 something and didn't make it to Sabbath service until 2pm - 2 hours late. AND I was still sleepy during the service. So much so I went to my car to take a nap. Even after taking the nap, when I came inside I was still sleepy! What in the world!
Now it is Sunday Morning 7:30am and I was unable to sleep. And I have to work 11 hours waitressing today. :-) I think I will be okay though.
On the plus side while I was not sleeping I was very productive and had some creative ideas as well as very well needed prayers. I have been lacking in prayer and spiritual activity. But praise Yahweh I finsally had ap 2 way conversation in prayer and also a revelation from Luke ch 1. More on that in my other blog: Walking with Yahushua
Thursday, March 20, 2014
waking up
I feel like such a failure. I have missed going to my volunteer work in the morning several times, because I couldn't wake up in time. I even went into work this week an hour late. I have a big problem with not waking up on time. It makes me feel like just quitting everything, all my obligations. But then I would be stuck in the bed all day, days on end. I want to keep my obligations, to keep me out of that depressed state. Is it my medication that makes me so difficult at waking up? Or is it just how I am naturally; Come to think of it even in elementary school I was hard to wake up. I was often chasing after the bus. I don't know what to do.
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Better
My alarm went off at 6am, I brushed it off. Thinking that's too early. My habits show that I prefer to wake up at the last minute and rush to the destination. I really needed to think to myself 6am yay I'm awake for prayer (that is when it starts), but that wasn't on my mind. I woke up with enough time to take a shower eat cereal and make it downtown for volunteering at 9/930. I was surprised at how quickly I made it there. What usually takes an hour took more like 30 minutes, I guess the traffic was less.
I remembered to bring a sandwich with me. It was a leftover one slice of panini, it didn't taste that great but I was happy I had it on me at the volunteer office, because I was hungry. I also brought an apple with me that I left in the car. It was a solid small meal. I actually like the idea of not eating a full meal, because I am already prone to snacking. Sweets are still in the picture, but I am knocking out fast food and adding fruit :-).
Another gold star goes to me for buying a bag of apples and oranges to keep in my car to add to my variety of granola bars, tuna salad kits, and Campbell's on the go soup hand-helds. I now am fully prepared for any hunger pains when I'm on the go. I have no excuse for fast food. I keep a few in the front, but most of it is in the trunk out of reach. This is also better than keeping it in the house, because I would eat it if it were in the pantry.
YAY! next goal to knock out, waking up 6am for prayer and exercise.
I remembered to bring a sandwich with me. It was a leftover one slice of panini, it didn't taste that great but I was happy I had it on me at the volunteer office, because I was hungry. I also brought an apple with me that I left in the car. It was a solid small meal. I actually like the idea of not eating a full meal, because I am already prone to snacking. Sweets are still in the picture, but I am knocking out fast food and adding fruit :-).
Another gold star goes to me for buying a bag of apples and oranges to keep in my car to add to my variety of granola bars, tuna salad kits, and Campbell's on the go soup hand-helds. I now am fully prepared for any hunger pains when I'm on the go. I have no excuse for fast food. I keep a few in the front, but most of it is in the trunk out of reach. This is also better than keeping it in the house, because I would eat it if it were in the pantry.
YAY! next goal to knock out, waking up 6am for prayer and exercise.
Monday, March 3, 2014
Fast food
Today I did not wake up early for prayer or exercise, but I did wake up so I was on time to my volunteer position. Which I am very happy about considering I stayed awake until 4am. So I had a choice as I was leaving volunteering, eat tuna salad, eat fast food, or rush home and eat some left overs. I choose fast food. I thought I wouldn't have enough time to go home but it prob would have been about the same as fast food. I couldn't eat the tuna salad on the run (while driving), so I was shying away form that. The best thing would have been if I would have remembered to bring my leftovers to eat before I left volunteering. Or at least brought the tuna salad to the office so I could eat it before I got to my car. I need to keep this in mind for Wednesday.
So eating the fast food burger was terrible. It had too much ketchup and the onion rings just tasted like oil. I hardly even ate any of them. I really want to quit fast food completely. I dunno maybe I could allow some flexibility if I'm in a bind to only have grilled chicken or salad from fast food. Its so hard for me to exclude things from my diet.
I really need to buy some fruit and vegetables. I need to always have fruit on me.
So eating the fast food burger was terrible. It had too much ketchup and the onion rings just tasted like oil. I hardly even ate any of them. I really want to quit fast food completely. I dunno maybe I could allow some flexibility if I'm in a bind to only have grilled chicken or salad from fast food. Its so hard for me to exclude things from my diet.
I really need to buy some fruit and vegetables. I need to always have fruit on me.
Looking back and going forward
I took the time to look back at when I began this post, to refresh the meaning behind it.
Quotes from my first post:
I will try to be better about posting regularly.
Quotes from my first post:
Kindling the Fire of Existence
I am embracing life. I realized that life is what you make of it, and my life right now isn't much. And I am the only one who can make something of my life. It takes effort too. I am ready to embrace that effort - to kindle that fire.
Motivation is hard to come by. It is my motto of the season to find excitement in the mundane. This is the only way I believe I can conjure up some motivation to do all the things I need to do for a better life but don't want to do. It is about convincing myself that I want this. I am not determined, but I want to be. I want to be determined, I want to be consistent. I need to be. All of my goals are nothing without consistency.
My hope is that having this blog I can reflect on my struggles and have a sense of accountability, and maybe one day someone will read this when I have succeeded and I can be an inspiration. My goals are small and simple, but my goal is more about gaining an attitude - the determination and commitment. With determination and commitment I can accomplish any other goal that I may come up with.Quoted from my profile:
I am determined to become determined, because determination is what is needed to survive in the life. I need determination to accomplish anything. My story is about gaining the motivation and applying it to my life.I want to be more frequent about posting. I have not been posting daily, I should at least post weekly. I think I haven't been posting, because I don't want to reveal my failures. I should be honest though.
I will try to be better about posting regularly.
Sunday, February 23, 2014
Tomorrow
Tomorrow. My goals wake up 6:00am community prayer, 6:30am exercise 7:30 leave for Atlanta volunteer. Do not eat any desserts/candy. Eat around 5pm, do not eat after work (10pm).
This really needs to be my morning routine, but it is so difficult for me to stick with it. I will try each morning though.
I need to find something to eat at lunch time that is quick and is not fast food. I really need to get in the practice of being food with me. One thing I know I can bring with me is an apple. This will at least take away any hunger until I can get to a meal.
I will let you know how it goes.
This really needs to be my morning routine, but it is so difficult for me to stick with it. I will try each morning though.
I need to find something to eat at lunch time that is quick and is not fast food. I really need to get in the practice of being food with me. One thing I know I can bring with me is an apple. This will at least take away any hunger until I can get to a meal.
I will let you know how it goes.
Friday, February 14, 2014
Abs Exercise Workout Sheet
These exercises are provided by www.bodybuilding.com which is a great website that give step by step instructions for many exercises and by www.shape.com.
I have condensed them into a few pages with pictures and descriptions of the exercise. This way you don't have to toggle between 10 different websites to look at how to do them.
I picked exercises I thought were easy.
Get the PDF file here.
I have condensed them into a few pages with pictures and descriptions of the exercise. This way you don't have to toggle between 10 different websites to look at how to do them.
I picked exercises I thought were easy.
Get the PDF file here.
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
Diet and Exercise
My mom bought a combination elliptical/recumbent bike. This gives me more motivation to workout. Now a cardio exercise will be much more available. If you don't have that luxury, I would say do jump rope. It is a really good cardio workout and can be done anywhere - perfect for someone who travels. You can watch TV while jumping - it helps keep you distracted from the actual exercise.
You may have heard me mention in posts past about interval training. The experts on Dr. Oz say that is the most effective weight loss. One expert said something like an hour at a jogging pace is equivalent to 15 min of interval training. Interval training is doing a period of high intensity followed by a period of slower/less intensity. Interval training can be done with any type of exercise. I feel like Interval training keeps me more interested in the exercise. Instead of slowly going and watching the clock til it hits 30minutes I am looking at the clock until 1minute has finished of my sprinting and my 2 minutes of slower pace have passed. It also makes me feel good when I am going as fast as I can.
What works best with my schedule is to workout in the morning, because I usually don't get home until after 10pm. So I bought instant espresso, prepare it the night before and drink it before beginning community prayer at 6am, when prayer ends the caffeine has taken affect and I don't feel like going back to sleep. Prayer ends at 6:30am, it is a big deal to wake me up so I am proud of myself when I make it.
Like today yay!
Diet:
I really need to change how I eat. Since I am on the run I am eating fast food a lot which is bad. I want to try and do the Feeling Good Diet from Food & Mood by Somer (my review of the book here), it has a good bit of fruits and vegetables which I want to incorporate more. The premise of the diet is to prevent mood swings. I am about to outline the diet here. I really hate counting calories, I am not going to be a stickler about this diet like measuring exact fat percents. In the book it talks about working your way up to keeping the full diet.
The Basics:
1. eat very little fat, sugar and caffeine
2. Daily consume 3 serv. fruits (at least one high in vitamin C), 4 serv. vegetables (a least 2 serv dark green or orange), 7 serv. whole grain breads and cereals, 3 serv. non-fat milk or yogurt, 1 serv. legumes; 2 serv. fish a week; No more than 2 serv. extra lean meat, chicken, fish, No more than 1 ser. nutritious fatty foods, No more than 2 tablespoons fats/oils, No more than one serv. sweets
3. Evenly disperse calories and nutrients into 5 or 6 mini meals throughout the day
4. Get a variety of nutrients from foods but also supplement with a moderate dos multi-vitiman and other mineral supplements
5. Drink 6 glasses of water daily
There is a separate serving size chart in the book, I don't know if it is comparable with the standard US size.
Today I started off with about a cup Quaker Oatmeal squares with about 1c skim milk. If you have never had this cereal I recommend it for snacking. It has 6g protein and 4g fiber per cup. I also had a grapefruit and 3 cups water. So far I have (2 serv. grains, 1 serv. fruit vit C, 1 serv dairy ) and (3 of water). When I went to the grocery store to buy veggies at the check out I fell for the last min snack in the line. I got snyders honey mustard pretzels (they are soo good!). Those probably count as a (2 serv. grain), even though probably high in fat (and probably sugar too). I was a little hungry and maybe if I choose an apple instead - which I could have just as easily purchased. I also consciously bought ice cream at the store, I am not quite ready to let go of sweets.
I tried Veggie Stir-Fry With Ginger and Black Bean Sauce for lunch (see below). It was really good and not too hard. I will simplify the recipe here. I paired it with a left over fish taco with a little rice (1 sev meat/fish 1 serv grain). The whole stir fry which consisted of eggplant, mushrooms, onions, carrots was about a cup, probably about (2 serv of veg). For dinner I ate 3 grilled chicken strips (1 serv meat), one serving is 3 oz see pic-->; to get some more veggs I ate raw carrots and cucumber, is a free food, in ranch dressing (1 serv veg) and drank (2 glasses water). And to finish the night I am having girl scout cookie somoas ice cream! Which I am counting as (1 serv dairy) Sorry I said that and yes it exists.
Sum total of the night:
Meat: 2 Grains:5 Vegg: 3 Dairy: 2 Fruit:1 Water:5
I need to figure out how to eat enough vegetables. Fruits are easier - they don't require preparation and they are naturally sweet. I need to learn how to cook vegetables in a yummy way, maybe a stir fry or roasted. The Food & Mood Cookbook by Somer & Williams has some recipes I should try: Veggie Stir-Fry With Ginger and Black Bean Sauce p212 and Roasted Gingered Vegetables p214, Green Beans and Toasted Slivered Almonds p216, Grilled Vegetables with Garlic and Balsamic Vinaigrette p227. The recipes in the feeling good diet cookbook are like gourmet, but once I get the hang of some of them I can simplify when I don't have specialty ingredients on hand.
"Veggie Stir-Fry with Ginger and Black Bean Sauce" adapted recipe made simple and less fancy This may make enough for 2 family meals but chopp everything up and saved the chopped veggs for making it again
Ingredients in italics
Slice thin: 2 carrots, 1 sweet onion, 1 1/2c mushrooms (not thin or buy sliced)
Chop coarsely: 2 zucchinis, 1 eggplant
Heat skillet with a litte olive oil medium/medium high if you didn't chop ahead of time chop carrots first throw them in to cook first while you chop the rest. Add eggplant and mush last
Add 2 cloves garlic minced, 2 tbsp grated fresh ginger
Cook until veggs are tender but crisp
Add black beans (drained&rinsed), soy sauce (a couple tbsp to taste), 1/4tsp red pep flakes, 2 tbsp chopped fresh cilantro, grated orange peel, taste it you may want to add more grated fresh ginger and minced garlic
Tomorrow is another day. It is about doing it every day.
Writing this blog really does get me more excited about this journey through wellness.
You may have heard me mention in posts past about interval training. The experts on Dr. Oz say that is the most effective weight loss. One expert said something like an hour at a jogging pace is equivalent to 15 min of interval training. Interval training is doing a period of high intensity followed by a period of slower/less intensity. Interval training can be done with any type of exercise. I feel like Interval training keeps me more interested in the exercise. Instead of slowly going and watching the clock til it hits 30minutes I am looking at the clock until 1minute has finished of my sprinting and my 2 minutes of slower pace have passed. It also makes me feel good when I am going as fast as I can.
What works best with my schedule is to workout in the morning, because I usually don't get home until after 10pm. So I bought instant espresso, prepare it the night before and drink it before beginning community prayer at 6am, when prayer ends the caffeine has taken affect and I don't feel like going back to sleep. Prayer ends at 6:30am, it is a big deal to wake me up so I am proud of myself when I make it.
Like today yay!
Diet:
I really need to change how I eat. Since I am on the run I am eating fast food a lot which is bad. I want to try and do the Feeling Good Diet from Food & Mood by Somer (my review of the book here), it has a good bit of fruits and vegetables which I want to incorporate more. The premise of the diet is to prevent mood swings. I am about to outline the diet here. I really hate counting calories, I am not going to be a stickler about this diet like measuring exact fat percents. In the book it talks about working your way up to keeping the full diet.
The Basics:
1. eat very little fat, sugar and caffeine
2. Daily consume 3 serv. fruits (at least one high in vitamin C), 4 serv. vegetables (a least 2 serv dark green or orange), 7 serv. whole grain breads and cereals, 3 serv. non-fat milk or yogurt, 1 serv. legumes; 2 serv. fish a week; No more than 2 serv. extra lean meat, chicken, fish, No more than 1 ser. nutritious fatty foods, No more than 2 tablespoons fats/oils, No more than one serv. sweets
3. Evenly disperse calories and nutrients into 5 or 6 mini meals throughout the day
4. Get a variety of nutrients from foods but also supplement with a moderate dos multi-vitiman and other mineral supplements
5. Drink 6 glasses of water daily
There is a separate serving size chart in the book, I don't know if it is comparable with the standard US size.
Today I started off with about a cup Quaker Oatmeal squares with about 1c skim milk. If you have never had this cereal I recommend it for snacking. It has 6g protein and 4g fiber per cup. I also had a grapefruit and 3 cups water. So far I have (2 serv. grains, 1 serv. fruit vit C, 1 serv dairy ) and (3 of water). When I went to the grocery store to buy veggies at the check out I fell for the last min snack in the line. I got snyders honey mustard pretzels (they are soo good!). Those probably count as a (2 serv. grain), even though probably high in fat (and probably sugar too). I was a little hungry and maybe if I choose an apple instead - which I could have just as easily purchased. I also consciously bought ice cream at the store, I am not quite ready to let go of sweets.
I tried Veggie Stir-Fry With Ginger and Black Bean Sauce for lunch (see below). It was really good and not too hard. I will simplify the recipe here. I paired it with a left over fish taco with a little rice (1 sev meat/fish 1 serv grain). The whole stir fry which consisted of eggplant, mushrooms, onions, carrots was about a cup, probably about (2 serv of veg). For dinner I ate 3 grilled chicken strips (1 serv meat), one serving is 3 oz see pic-->; to get some more veggs I ate raw carrots and cucumber, is a free food, in ranch dressing (1 serv veg) and drank (2 glasses water). And to finish the night I am having girl scout cookie somoas ice cream! Which I am counting as (1 serv dairy) Sorry I said that and yes it exists.
Sum total of the night:
Meat: 2 Grains:5 Vegg: 3 Dairy: 2 Fruit:1 Water:5
I need to figure out how to eat enough vegetables. Fruits are easier - they don't require preparation and they are naturally sweet. I need to learn how to cook vegetables in a yummy way, maybe a stir fry or roasted. The Food & Mood Cookbook by Somer & Williams has some recipes I should try: Veggie Stir-Fry With Ginger and Black Bean Sauce p212 and Roasted Gingered Vegetables p214, Green Beans and Toasted Slivered Almonds p216, Grilled Vegetables with Garlic and Balsamic Vinaigrette p227. The recipes in the feeling good diet cookbook are like gourmet, but once I get the hang of some of them I can simplify when I don't have specialty ingredients on hand.
"Veggie Stir-Fry with Ginger and Black Bean Sauce" adapted recipe made simple and less fancy This may make enough for 2 family meals but chopp everything up and saved the chopped veggs for making it again
Ingredients in italics
Slice thin: 2 carrots, 1 sweet onion, 1 1/2c mushrooms (not thin or buy sliced)
Chop coarsely: 2 zucchinis, 1 eggplant
Heat skillet with a litte olive oil medium/medium high if you didn't chop ahead of time chop carrots first throw them in to cook first while you chop the rest. Add eggplant and mush last
Add 2 cloves garlic minced, 2 tbsp grated fresh ginger
Cook until veggs are tender but crisp
Add black beans (drained&rinsed), soy sauce (a couple tbsp to taste), 1/4tsp red pep flakes, 2 tbsp chopped fresh cilantro, grated orange peel, taste it you may want to add more grated fresh ginger and minced garlic
Tomorrow is another day. It is about doing it every day.
Writing this blog really does get me more excited about this journey through wellness.